Friday, March 30, 2012

You can run but you can't hide

Claire likes to keep a close eye on things around here.  She likes to constantly know where people are and what they're doing.

I go into her room to get her in the morning or after her nap she'll ask where her dad is.  I say, "Where do you think he is?" She responds, "work." If I tell her he's not at work then she'll say, "potty?"

When her dad goes into her room in the morning she asks where I am.  He says, "Where do you think she is?" She responds, "blankets."  Meaning that I am either in bed or on the couch snuggled in blankets.

You can't hide your true self from a toddler.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Recipe for Success

Take one naked baby,
one sunny spring day (need not be warm depending on your baby type),
several measuring cups, spoons and toothbrushes,
and one porch.

Add one pot of water.

Enjoy a little time for yourself

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Nap time stresses me out

Sometimes nap time stresses me out.  Claire sleeps for between 1.5 and 2 hours every day.  Nap time is "me" time.  No one else is home, the house is quiet and I get to do whatever I want to do. Sometimes I do contracting work, sometimes I read, sometimes I watch TV and blog, there were a couple of months there were I napped myself every day.  But I always "do" something that's just for me.

And that is actually where the stress comes in.  When things come up that don't fit into my categorization of "me" time it throws me for a little loop.  Prepping for dinner, for example, does not count as "me" time.  Showering, tampoco. Cleaning up the lunch dishes, straightening up the house, folding laundry, none of these count as "me" time.  The trick is that I actually have to do them very frequently during nap time and every time I do it stresses me out because I know that I'm wasting this most precious time of the day.

Have you ever gone a long time without going on a real date with your significant other?  And when you finally go on a date, months or weeks later, you feel like you need to be enjoying every second of it?  And if you're just having a good time but not a great time you're wasting this one opportunity you have for a date?

Nap time brings up that same kind of crazy in me.

Monday, March 26, 2012

When you know, you know.

Last week grandma sent money for Claire's birthday present. I had asked for a pair of saltwater sandals. We had a pair last year (which grandma bought us--I don't know that I would have splurged on them but I am so glad grandma did because I am convinced forever of their amazingness).  Last year's pair was bright pink and Claire wore them almost every day for nearly 10 months.  We decided it was time to retire them just last month when we put them on and after taking a couple of steps Claire called out, "too tight.  Too tight."

Thursday we walked into Nordstrom and I held Claire up to the display and said, "What color do you want? White, silver, pink or purple?" I would have picked white or silver--practical me thinking about how you can wear those with everything and when you're spending $30 on a pair of kid shoes you want to make the most of them.  Claire had a different idea.  As soon as she saw the bright purple sandals her little face lit up and I could just tell that those sandals sang to her heart. "Purple! Purple!" she called.

So we splurged.  All I had to do was remind myself that really, you can wear bright purple sandals with everything too.

*I know it was a good decision as she has insisted on napping with the shoes in her crib for the last 3 days.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

The Ugly Duckling

Yesterday I went to a religious meeting where they played this video.  I cried like a baby (this can probably only be partially blamed on my current VERY heightened emotional state).

As a person who often sees herself as an ugly duckling, I would like to share it with you.

If you don't have the 3 minutes to dedicate to watching I'll just quote for you the best bit.

"Look into the water and see your true reflection.  It is my prayer and blessing that when you look at your reflection you will be able to see beyond imperfections and self doubt and recognize who you truly are; glorious sons and daughter of the most holy God."

Swim on my dear swan friends, swim on.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

But that would be insincere

Dear Neighbors, Landscapers and property management company,
If you are wondering who has been...

pulling all of the red berries off the of bushes and putting them into the cracks in the sidewalk,

and beheading the lavender plants I have a confession.  If you're wondering why the side of the pink flower bush closest to our house is completely bare of blooms,

and why all of the rocks in one section of landscaping are suddenly missing (don't worry--only a small percentage of them are off the premise.  You'll find the majority of them thrown into the bushes.)

I confess.  It's us. I'd apologize but that would be insincere--I'm not really sorry.


Tuesday, March 20, 2012

30 Rocking

Remember how I told you I'm a born rule follower? I've been catching up on my 30 Rock viewing and it seems that Liz Lemon and I are soul mates.

“What do the rules ever get me? The worst seat the movies? A bunch of music that I paid for? A drawer full of leaky batteries that I don’t know what to do with? Rules? There’s only one rule now, Kenneth. Plastic cups go on the top rack of the dish rack so they don’t melt. Otherwise, no rules!” — Liz

Well played Liz Lemon.  Well Played.

Monday, March 19, 2012

Get Rich Quick

After more than a year of blogging here on this blog it seems clear to me that it is never going to make me a million dollars (or even just $10).   I have come to terms with that (mostly).

I have been toying around with the idea for a new blog which I am sure will take the internet by storm and make me a millionaire. Imagine this little piece of brilliance if you will.

 Blog Title: "Things a Chubby Girl Thinks."

Blog header:

Blog content: Each blog post would be a thought that has actually crossed my brain at one point. ex.

1) I bet this would be better with peanut butter.

2) Do you think I could substitute coconut milk for 2%?

3) Of course I'll lick the beaters. No sense wasting good batter.

4) I've already showered.  I can't go to the gym now.

Admit it.  You're hooked already.  What did I tell you?  It's a look into a mind that has an obsession with food, lots of creativity and little to no self control.

Millionaire in no time.

Friday, March 16, 2012

May the road rise to meet you too

I love St. Patrick's Day. Actually, I love any holiday that doesn't require me to decorate or stress out but encourages sillyness and lots of food.

We're hosting co-op and have 5 friends coming for a St. Patty's Day party.  We're eating green mac and cheese (made with spinach noodles and ground up spinach to make it have the appearance of healthyness) and chocolate brownies with mint chocolate icecream on top. Other than that I think we'll just run around the house like crazy and teach them the milkshake song and speak with fake Irish accents.

And, in case your wondering if we snacked on the brownies while we were making them the answer is yes.

Thursday, March 15, 2012


Last week (or was it the week before?--hard to say) we got the most amazing package in the mail.  What's even more amazing is that is was unsolicited (unless you count blog-ranting about having to sing the same songs over and over as soliciting.) Rory, who is a children's librarian, set us these two amazing CDs.

She said that she uses them all the time in her 2-year old story time.  And really, I don't know how you've lived this long without them.  A version of "Wheels on the Bus" that has a verse that says, "Rosa Parks on the bus says, "I won't go."


And I think that we have nearly worn out the track "milkshake."

Thank you Auntie Rory. We love the CDs.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

You have brains in your head....

Are you ever shocked at what your brain remembers?

The other day I was driving home from a meeting and that song Jenny/867-5309 by Tommy Tutone came on the radio.  Suddenly I was overwhelmed with memory of being 4 years old.  I snuck into my mom's room, picked up the phone and dialed 8675309 over and over again until someone picked up. I'm a born rule follower (even now I carefully count items before I go in the 15 and under express checkout line at the grocery store) so sneaking away to do something that I knew was naughty was pretty memorable.  A nice older woman picked up the phone and talked to me for a little while.  Before we hung up she told me that I should probably ask my mom before I used the phone.

I am almost 33 years old and I can tell you what the wall paper in my parents room looked like and how the sun was slanting through the blinds but 9 times out of 10 I can't remember why I stood up and walked into the other room.

Do you ever wonder why our brain keeps those snippits of life? Is there something to learn? was some valuable part of my character formed at that moment?  Is there some reason that that specific memory is emblazoned into my brain?

What about you? What random things are floating around that brain of yours?

Monday, March 12, 2012

Scenes From Last Week

motivation has been a little hard to come by.  I'm stuck in the middle of yet another dental drama (I'm scheduled for my second root canal in a year on the 29th.  The waiting for the 29th with the dull ache in  my jaw is going to be long.  If I seem snippy and emotional it's not you; it's me) and sometimes the very act of getting off the couch when I don't have to seems overwhelming.  I know that this is partially due to pregnancy.  Something they don't tell you is that pregnancy comes with it's own kind of depression for lots of women.  Sure, there are some women who glow and feel like they've never been more beautiful and then there are those of us who feel like our bodies are betraying us--yes, it's for a good cause but it still feels like a betrayal to suddenly not fit into any of your pants and to be unable to stop eating microwave popcorn and top ramen.

It's not that we didn't have a great week and I didn't pull myself off the couch.  We did and I did. We went to the beach (where we saw dolphins twice--it's true we live in paradise), we went to the gym dressed up like we were going to the beach, Claire ran around the house naked (and went to the bathroom in the potty), I got two amazing packages in the mail (which I will tell you about later I promise) and we generally had a good time.  I reread the entire Hunger Game series (just a little movie prep don't you know.)  But the urge to sit on the couch with my feet up was strong.  Very strong.

So here's to a better week this week.  may it not feel like a chore to open up the computer and may Claire please remember that we are not the kind of parents who rock her to sleep (or the kind who have done so since she was 3 months old).  It's been ugly.  I'm baking banana bread for the new neighbor upstairs tomorrow to apologize for the fact that last night he had to listen to a certain little girl's voice calling out, "mommy, help me. Daddy, help me.  Heeeeelllllllppppp me" for the entire hour between 3 and 4 this morning.

Just ready for a trip to the gym 

Claire lead a semi-nudist lifestyle

A dollar store find that has brought no end of joy to Claire

Wave jumping 

Monday, March 5, 2012

Ain't Nothin' Like the First Time

That your mom buys a bag of Doritos* and lets you go to town.

*In all honesty they were the Trader Joes version of Doritos and they're just not as good.  Something about no artificial colors or flavors and the lack of high fructose corn syrup.

**Can we please blame the fact that I am buying bags of Doritos on pregnancy? The checker at Trader Joes looked at my cart on Friday and said, "Snack Attack?"  It was a little embarrassing.

Friday, March 2, 2012

Children's Books For Parent's Who Actually Read to Their Children

Ladies and gentlemen,
Your responses to my rant about the list of 50 best children's books was incredible. You had such good suggestions so this weekend I am going to use my considerable skills* to make a little list that you can pin to pinterest. So if you haven't checked in yet with your favorite books for toddlers that are actually fun to read and that toddlers actually like you should do so now.

*When I say "my considerable skills" I mean my skills of persuasion because I have no design skills AT ALL. However, my mother-in-law does and my skills will be used trying to convince her to make this list look lovely.

I haven't read this one yet but it's on the list.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

What's with today, today?

Today I am sitting at my desk eating frosting out of a container and ignoring the work that needs to be done.

Oh the crying and the screaming and how mom telling you that you have to sit down while you're eating can change an average moment into the world's worst moment.

Joanna Goddard (who has a son who is just about Claire's age) says that she's thinking of writing a book about this year called "A Portrait of Courage."

That makes me laugh out loud but it's the kind of laugh where real tears are coming out too.

**If you get that title reference just know that I love you even more.